CATCHING UP: Part Two

It's been a while--ok, I confess--a long time, since we posted our mission experience on this blog. It’s my bad, as my kids taught me to say. JannaLee is in hopes that we might publish this blog as a way of preserving our mission in some form, printing it from blogspot when we finish. I’ve been faithfully writing in my journal. The blog has taken a back seat to that. But as we get closer to finishing our mission, I’m beginning to feel the promptings, not of the Spirit, exactly, but of my companion. And living as devoutly on this mission as I can, I'm learning to act upon those impressions. As such, I give you: CATCHING UP: Part Two.

July 2, 2017

We didn’t officially meet with the Soloai’s this Sunday. We met them casually, however. I was intent on taking my coat off when first coming into the Hataitai Building. Sister Soloai was standing by the coat rack. I nonchalantly greeted her, like I had been greeting others on my way to the corner of the foyer. As I hung my coat up, I realized who I had just shaken hands with—notwithstanding she had mistakenly called me Elder Clark. I walked back into the centre of the foyer just in time to meet President Soloai as he struck up a conversation with JannaLee. I greeted Sister Soloai more properly. 

Then I turned to meet Pres. Soloai. He said I looked better than our mission photo. (I hope so.) I think I look orange in that photo. So does JannaLee—that is, JannaLee looks orange too. As the President said: We are better looking in person.

July 6, 2017

MLC stands for “Mission Leader Conference.” Every transfer all the Zone Leaders are invited to Wellington to be instructed by the Mission President, the Assistants, and anyone else they invite to speak. 

This time around President Soloai asked me to speak on the importance of living in well-ordered and clean flats. The topic may sound like a “Yawner.” But the Spirit was strong in the meeting. From the first moment I began to open my mouth, I felt the Spirit directing me, giving me words, opening my mind to the vision of what I should share. By the Spirit we laughed, we focused, we were serious, we worshipped—all in the context of encouraging the missionaries to follow the counsel of the Savior “to look unto him in every thought, not to doubt, nor fear; to do so in order to prepare a house of God--their flat--comparable only with the temple in sacredness” (D&C 6:36; 88:119).

July 7, 2017

We drove with the Hjortens to Palmerston North today for Zone Conference. President Soloai asked me to address the missionaries during the Zone Conference on the same topic I had spoken to during MLC. 

JannaLee and I got up at 5:30 am to be ready to leave at 7 am. It would take about 2 hours to get to Palmerston North—or so we figured. 

But we hadn’t planned on traveling a new stretch of highway put in about three months or so. This took a half hour off our travel.

When we pulled into the church parking lot, after having stopped momentarily at a bakery to get some apple and apricot crisps—and a crème pancake—I felt like I had come home in a way. I wondered what was causing this impression. 

Then it hit me. 

As I looked at the cars in the parking lot, I knew why I felt a familiar spirit. It was the license plates on the cars, (what Kiwis call REGOs). 

I have been looking at those REGOs since the time I was reassigned to be the coordinator of the mission fleet. Now, here were a good number of the cars I’d been looking at on paper and through Excel. Seeing numbers like HQC353 or GWK752 was like being reunited with my children. These numbers took on a color and “a face” sporting the car associated with them. The more the missionaries drove up and parked, the more I felt like I was involved in a kind of family reunion. Not only was I happy to see the missionaries stepping out of their cars, but their cars were kind of dear to me, as well.

Zone Conference is always spiritually uplifting and instructive--most of them, anyway. Palmerston Zone Conference carried a unique spirit, since it was the first time President and Sister Soloai taught the missionaries. 

It was during the Zone Conferences that JannaLee and I witnessed the love and trust that President and Sister Soloai have for the missionaries. This Conference was no different. Being Islanders they have "big hearts." President, being Samoan, Sister Soloai being Tongan, they carry a spirit of love and fellowship throughout their instruction to the missionaries. Sister Soloai is definitely endowed with the spirit of being the mission mother. She represents to me what my mother would have been like had she been Tongan. When President Soloai concluded this, and all conferences,he speaks with incisive authority. You feel that, not only does he know that Jesus lives; he knows Him.

Some Time Before

Attending Zone Conferences throughout the mission was to become part of our responsibility during this transfer. It had been during the Hutt Zone Conference prior to Palmerston, that President Soloai took JannaLee and me aside into an adjacent room. 

He said that the Spirit had been witnessing to Him that I was not only to give my presentation during this one Zone Conference. I was to travel with him and Sister Soloai, instructing the missionaries throughout the mission. Sometime soon thereafter, JannaLee was assigned to give a presentation on general health practice, Sister Hjorten, on basic emotional wellness, and Elder Hjorten was to share his family conversion story to emphasize different ways of “Finding.” We were just about to become busier “in the office” than we ever imagined.

July 11, 2017

It’s interesting how the Lord works. For first part of our Zone Tours JannaLee focused upon teaching the missionaries basic health practices to stay well. But her assignment was soon to change before we visited Nelson’s Zone Conference.

Sister Soloai called a short meeting with Sister Hjorten and JannaLee, saying that she wanted them to help her teach principles in Adjusting to Missionary Life. This came as she talked with President Soloai, confessing to him that she is not happy with her part of the Zone Conference training. He said, “Why don’t you ask Sisters Hjorten and Ward to help you out? I’m using Elders Hjorten and Ward for my part in the Conferences.” She said she never thought of that. But the more she considered it, the better she felt about delegating sections of the manual to them. She would do her presentation, but she would have them present, as well. JannaLee would cover the physical part of “adjustment.” Sister Hjorten would discuss the social aspect of “adjustment.” Sister Soloai would then take stress, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual “adjustment.”

What was I doing during this meeting? I was receiving phone calls: confirming appointments for plumbers, for tree trimmers, for fixing shower hoses and heads. I was processing over-due vehicle damage reports and sending bond forms to property owners who filled out the wrong amount to be refunded. I was doing all this—and more—to take care of all things necessary to leave Wellington early in the morning to catch a flight to Nelson, to attend and teach at the Nelson Zone Conference for the day, then fly back home.

This gives some indication of how intense our days had become.

Nelson Zone Conference

Zone Conference in Nelson saw us as a mission office come to together with President and Sister Soloai. 

As I mentioned last above, Sister Soloai invited JannaLee and Sister Hjorten to teach part of the “Adjusting to Missionary Work” handbook. When it came time for them to teach, they were a terrific trio. Each shared important principles and truths by the power of the Spirit according to their own personalities. 

There was humour  information, scripture, medical, social, and spiritual instruction. Plus the fun sociality that characterises people reuniting in faith and testimony.

July 13, 2017

We got up at 5 am in preparation to catch a flight from Wellington to Christchurch for the Christchurch Zone Conference. Flights were cancelled last night—particularly the flights of the APs and President and Sister Soloai. They drove to Palmerston North in order to catch a flight this morning. But their flight was cancelled. They had to take a later flight, which would put them in Christchurch two hours after the time the Conference was supposed to start. 

We found out our flight was cancelled at 6 am. JannaLee got a text alert. She texted the Hjortens, but they didn’t look at their phones. They came to the office expecting to leave with us, only to discover that the flight had been cancelled. This threw Elder Hjorten into a panic, trying to get us on another flight, only to learn that there was none to be purchased, and the money we had already paid would only be applied to some future flight—no refunds!

July 15, 2017

It was unlikely that I would attend zone conference in Dunedin. It seemed evident that JannaLee wouldn’t attend. Friday she began coughing that family cough that intimated a chest cold was coming on. Saturday morning she woke up, chest cold more apparent. I thought about getting ready to go to the zone conference. But the more I thought about it, the idea didn’t settle with me. I felt I should stay with JannaLee. She wouldn’t be feeling up to much. I could wait on her.

In my mind the symbol of staying home was putting on my green turtle neck shirt. But my white shirts in the closet kept coming to mind as well. Even so, when JannaLee asked me what I was going to do, I said I was going to stay. I even called the Hjortens to let them know that I wouldn’t be going; that JannaLee got slammed with a chest cold. We would be staying behind.

As I showered I kept tossing whether to go or not in my mind. I felt better with the prospects of not attending the conference, while questioning this decision seems to stir me up into a stupor of thought. So while shaving I thought about taking the new GPS unit I had gotten acquainted with the day before and finding the APs flat, and getting the nebulizer from them for JannaLee.

After I exercised I was still a bit unsettled. It was now about 6:45am. We were to leave the office at 7:30. As I looked around at the clothes JannaLee and I had intended to pack for ourselves, and the white suitcase we had intended to use, I wondered if I should go. I had listened to Elder Bednar speak in a General Conference address entitled “Revelation,” in the April 2011 Conference. It had been good to be reminded of the two general types of revelation: the strong, immediate kind, and the most subtle, line-up-line kind.

Wanting to take my concern to JannaLee, I walked into our bedroom. JannaLee was on Facebook watching some dance video segment. I felt betrayed. Here I was wondering if I should go; she knew that. And yet it seemed that it was but a second priority item to what’s posted on Facebook. I invited her to focus her attention on the important issue at hand; that I needed her help. I went into the bedroom to begin dressing: green turtle neck, or white shirt? Then I felt we should pray together before I got dressed to gain God’s revelation.

So I walked back into the bedroom and invited JannaLee to pray with me. I acted as voice, and prayed earnestly to know what I should do; that God would cut through the indecisiveness of my thoughts and reveal his mind to us. After I finished the prayer, I walked back into the other room where I dress. 

As I looked at the clothes out on the beds lying next to the suitcase, I received a strong impression. It almost felt like a panic attack. The import of it was: “You better start packing so you can make the flight.” I paused, feeling distinctly a type of fear-factor in this impression. The more I paused and looked, the stronger it grew. I didn’t have much time to get ready to get on the plane. I walked quickly into the bedroom and told JannaLee that I was going to Dunedin, and that I needed her help. She leapt out of bed and began packing my clothes in her mother’s carry-on, consolidating my things. While she did this, I put on my white shirt and then proceeded to get dressed in my suit. 

The half-hour we had seemed to both fly by, and freeze in place, allowing us to prepare to leave. There was not time to question what I was doing. No time to feel remiss about leaving JannaLee, or thinking about getting on the flight alone. I was going. There was no question. Everything I did made that more and more certain until I kissed JannaLee on the cheek, walked down the stairs to the office, met the Hjortens, and was sitting in the back seat of the van on my way to Wellington Airport.

More than a Zone Conference

Dunedin Zone Conference was as inspiring as it was cold.

We walked into the building and were told that that the meeting was being held in the gym. I had asked the Zone Leaders to set it up in the chapel. But they decided not to. We froze. The fan in the gym roared, as always. We couldn’t hear very well. The accommodations were sub-par. I knew they would be. That’s why I asked the ZLs to hold the conference in the chapel. They chose to do otherwise. As the knight in Indiana Jones observed: "They chose poorly."

When we entered the gym, it was very quiet. We weren't sure what the missionaries were doing. But soon on, the O’Sullivans shared their “finding method.” Then I knew where we were in the conference. The missionaries were sharing their most confident finding methods. This is what the president has done in each zone conference.

Prior to lunch I did my training. It worked well. Afterward, Sister Savage said she wants me to be her gospel doctrine teacher. Others complimented me. I ate lunch talking with the Savages and the O’Sullivans. While attempting to take the seat I had during the first part of the conference, President Soloai asked me to get my notepad and follow him.

He took me into the stake president’s office. There we sat in an ice-box of a room. The heater tried to warm up the space while President Soloai began to speak to me of an assignment he wanted to extend to me. He said that he had been talking with President Haleck of the Pacific South Area Presidency. He asked him if he could assign me to be the executive secretary of the New Zealand Wellington Mission Presidency.

He said that he felt he had more than enough work cut out for him focusing upon directing the missionaries. Now he was concerned about how he was going to meet his responsibilities in directing the work in the stakes and the districts in the mission. He needed someone to remind him of his stake and district responsibilities. He had prayed. As he did, he was moved to think of me. Then he looked at me and said something like: “And Elder Ward: I respect your abilities and your commitment to the work. I knew you could handle this responsibility along with all you are currently doing. I need you, Elder Ward. Will you accept this assignment?”

I said without hesitation, “Of course I will.” I then read back the notes I had taken, asking for clarification as I did. This moved Pres. Soloai to realize that there were other things he needed me to do. Suffice it to say, during the meeting of my call, I became President Soloai's executive secretary immediately in word and in deed.

Teaching the Joyful Principle of Forgiveness

It just may be that the reason I felt such a strong impression to attend the Dunedin Zone Conference wasn’t for the Conference alone. 

During the evening of the day of the Conference, Elders Tuatonga and Baer asked me to join them for a lesson with, I'll call her Ruth. Ruth's in her 70s and is struggling with guilt based upon the fact that after she married a non-member, she fell into inactivity for many years. Her children were not raised in the church. Now, after all these years, she feels drawn back to church. But her family isn’t interested. She sees all the things she did in “denial of the Lord,” as she says. So we taught “The Gospel of Jesus Christ,” with an emphasis upon faith in Christ unto repentance in the hope of receiving forgiveness of sins. Throughout the lesson, Ruth would admit that she prays to be forgiven, but she can’t shake the guilt. The Elders said they had brought me along in order to teach her how she might look to Christ to have her guilt taken away. I felt to turn to Enos to teach that Ruth must let go of her assumption that she is undeserving of the marvelous gift of forgiveness. I orchestrated a reading of Enos in which we each read a verse. Then I proceeded to explicate the verses we read to emphasize that Enos was amazed at the forgiveness of God, for he too must have felt that he didn’t deserve it. When he asked “How is it done,” God answered him, “Because of thy faith in Christ, whom thou has neither heard nor seen.” This was the focus of my instruction. Ruth seemed to begin to understand she could be forgiven if she believed that through Christ she could.

To help Ruth feel the promise of her own forgiveness, Elder Tuatonga appropriately shared how he has felt the forgiveness of his sins, and the change of heart, that comes through Christ’s redemptive love. Before coming on his mission, Elder Tuatonga was a street fighter. He lived for the fight or what he called, “finding the king.” But during this time, he said he always felt bad about beating his opponent up. After each time of hitting another in the face and dropping him to the ground, Elder Tuatonga would think long and hard about what might happen to the person. Would he heal? Would he be messed over for the rest of his life? The more he allowed himself to think of these things, coupled with a more intent-full reading of the Book of Mormon, Elder Tuatonga began to change. He no longer wanted to fight with his friends. He didn’t want to hurt anyone. But the fights of the past bothered him, and he felt unworthy. He said he prayed to God to forgive him. And as he lived true to his commitment not to fight, his heart became softened, and he felt God’s forgiveness.

One thing I taught from this is that God’s forgiveness must be received from us in order to be complete. He can extend it to us. But if we reject or resist it by choosing to feel undeserving, disbelieving that God could ever forgive us for how callously we turned from him, we will never experience the peace of conscience and wholeness of soul God through Christ desires to bless us with.

At the end of the discussion, Elder Baer told Ruth that they wanted to change the commitment they had extended to her. Rather than pray to be forgiven of her sins, she was to pray to have the guilt of her past sins swept away. We asked her if she had ever prayed that way. She said she hadn’t. She then said she would pray for forgiveness, to which I drew her mind back to the language of the commitment Elder Baer had extended, emphasizing that she pray to have her guilt swept away as she exercised her faith in Christ. She said she would do that. I asked her how she thought she would feel if that were to occur. She said it would be wonderful. I bore testimony, that unlike she’s always felt, (that that day would be hers only after this life), she could feel God’s complete forgiveness in her life—and that through faith in Christ, it was just around the corner. It was a choice discussion. The Spirit confirmed what we taught. I was happy to have been asked to teach with the Elders.

July 18, 2017

While sitting in the Wellington Airport, waiting for our flight to Napier to where Hawke's Bay Zone Conference was to be held, a woman with an eight-year old took the two seats next to me. I could hear the eight-year old whisper, “Look there’s an elder.” I turned and affirmed that I am an elder serving a mission for the Church. He said he had just been baptized this month. His name is Pororangi. He was excited to talk to me about his baptism. He said the water was hot—not just real warm, but hot. He had to get out of it and wait for the elders to cool it down before he could be baptized. I told Pororangi that a family in Lower Hutt had been baptized in ice-cold water. After the first son was baptised, the nine-year old didn’t want to go through with it. He clung to his father, trying to keep his legs from touching the water. It didn't go down too well--nor did he. In fact the family have put off his baptism. They are planning to baptize him soon. The woman with Pororangi was his care-giver. She was taking him to Palmerston North to visit his siblings. I didn’t ask about the family condition. They are from Nelson. Transitioning from talking about the family, explained the significance of Pororangi’s baptism to him. In doing so, I encouraged him to serve a full-time mission to provide others the opportunity to be baptized like him. He first said he didn’t want to go. But the more we talked together, he began to soften in his resistance. At the conclusion of what I shared with him, he turned to his care-giver and said, “You know, I think I want to be a missionary.” 

Too Soon

Final testimonies during the Zone Conference hit home to me. Elders Tautu, Ramirez, and Gardner bore testimony. 

I told them that as they bore their witnesses of Christ and the restored gospel, I reflected upon each one having born testimony during our district meetings in Dunedin. That was something like a year ago. Now, here they were offering their final testimonies before going home! Hard to believe.

July 20-21, 2017

Senior Couple Conference. President Soloai felt deeply about bringing all the senior couples to Wellington in order to enjoy a two-day retreat in which he could instruct us as to what he was instructed during the New Mission Presidents Seminar in June. It's difficult to capture on the page how inspiring this conference was. We met on the evening of the 19th for food and get-together games. 

Then the next morning we met for instruction. Afterward we drove to Mount Victoria Look Out to take some group photos. 

Then we drove to the Te Papa Museum to the Gallipoli exhibit. Then back to the Soloai's for dinner and social time.

The morning session was marvelous. JannaLee and I had been assigned to take the last session. JannaLee taught the importance of seeking, not merely to know about Christ, but to know him. And living our lives so we come to know that he knows us.

I taught how important it is to allow the Book of Mormon to be the means by which the Father can draw us to Christ by studying “the words and the way they are used in the Book of Mormon.” I used President Benson’s instruction: “The words and the way they are used in the Book of Mormon by the Lord should become our source of understanding and should be used by us in teaching gospel principles. God uses the power of the word of the Book of Mormon as an instrument to change people's lives.” I then was blessed to orchestrate a wonderful discussion on the importance of being open to learn how to use the Book of Mormon by the Spirit by enjoying revelation as to what the words are, and how they are framed.

With seven minutes to go, I turned to teaching the group what the Book of Mormon teaches about “the word.” I could have taught so much more than I did. But from the feed back I received, what I taught inspired the group to read the Book of Mormon more carefully.

Both President and Sister Soloai concluded the conference with stirring testimonies: Sister Soloai in gentle and motherly tones; President Soloai in passionate, declarative exhortation.

President Soloai invited us to look into the eyes of the missionaries, and to see what they can become. To serve them so that they become all they can become through Christ. He then posed the question: “How are you different from the young missionaries?” He then pointed out the obvious: “You are 40 plus years older.” But then he said, “Everything the Lord’s trying to teach these young missionaries—faith in Christ, repentance, faithful commitment to covenants, living to serve, sacrificing to build up the kingdom of God—these you have done, or are doing. I want the young missionaries to be able to look into your eyes and see what they can become.” The perspective was stirring and humbling. 

   
July 20, 2017

Tonight was Henry Roach’s baptism. Elders Price and Clark asked me to give the talk on Repentance and Baptism—which I did. Afu gave her talk on the blessings of the Holy Ghost’s promptings. We went to the baptistery to witness Henry’s baptism. He had to go under twice, due to the odd way he gripped Elder Price’s arm. On the way back to the chapel, Sister Soloai commented on how the elders had not prepared Henry for the baptismal procedure. She was right. It was unfortunate that Henry’s baptism didn’t go more smoothly. But once it was over, Henry seemed please with the entire thing.

President and Sister Soloai showed up at the baptism. Pres. Soloai was invited to share some remarks. He talked about how blessed Henry was for receiving the first ordinance of the gospel. 

How blessed he will be while receiving the laying on of hands tomorrow, and how blessed he will yet be as he lives worthy to receive the ordinance of having the Aaronic Priesthood and Melchizedek Priesthood conferred upon him as he sets his sights toward receiving his endowment and the sealing ordinances. President Soloai said that as important as it is for Henry to attend Victoria University, it was even more vital for him to conduct his life so that he is worthy to attend the University of the Lord: one of which is in Hamilton, New Zealand.

End: Part Two